Living in autopilot
You are living in autopilot – you brush with the same paste every morning, take the same route to work, conduct your reviews and meetings in the same way, interact with the same type of people, and follow the same evening routine. While routine offers comfort, it can trap you in outdated worldviews – the ones you formed as children, adolescents, or as young adults. You barely question this mindless living unless jolted by a life-altering event.
In autopilot mode, you:
Stop asking questions
Don’t experience life
Barely exist
Autopilot mode offers efficiency. Efficiency is valuable but is meant for machines not for humans. Disrupt patterns to live fully.
“The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity.” – Rollo May
Authenticity is felt
Authenticity is felt, not spoken. In fact, the more we talk about being authentic, the less we tend to embody it.
Speaking aloud your exact thoughts and emotions is not authenticity. What is authentic is shared with responsibility and dignity.
Everyone carries shades of grey and conflicting emotions. Authentic expression doesn’t require dramatic outbursts. It can be a graceful insight offered with sensitivity and sensibility. When we express ourselves with awareness and respect, we create space for genuine connection.
“Speak the truth, but not to punish.” – Thich Nhat Hanh
Idealizing humans
You often idealize those you admire, people you deeply trust, people who seem flawless. In doing so, you project your own ideals on to them, expecting them to uphold a version of perfection that doesn’t exist. You fail to see the reality which lies in their fallibility, humanity, complexity.
As a result, you end up unknowingly harm yourself and your relationship with them. You feel:
Pained when you see them fail
Betrayed when they don’t uphold your projection
Discomfort when they struggle with their imperfections
The “perfect Father”, the “devoted mother”, the “ideal spouse”, or the “happiest buddy” are myths you create to shield yourselves from the raw truth of being human.
“To idealize is to dehumanize.” – Brené Brown