Embrace our current selves
We are constantly changing ourselves consciously or unconsciously. One day, our gradual changes become visible to us and others. We are quick to draw comparisons with our older selves, while others want us to get back to our older version.
For Instance-
We might say to ourselves, “I used to be someone […]. How can I get back to my [older] best version again?”
Our best friend might complain, “You were such a cool chap. Why have you become so serious?”
The nostalgia of our past selves can prevent us from recognizing that we are evolving into our newer selves. Alternatively, we can embrace our current selves and observe how we are growing into who we are becoming.
“You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.” – Jan Glidewell, Author of My Regards to ‘The Kid’
Rationalizing
Many years ago, one of my teachers used to tell that “Humans are not rational but they are always rationalizing.” I did not appreciate the depth of that statement then but now I do. If there is a choice to actualize or rationalize, we would often prefer the latter. That is because it is easier to defend our reality than to question it. We eventually gain mastery in rationalizing but don’t reach our own potential. One way to change this is to find someone who can ask those questions and stop us from rationalizing. Today, who can be that person in our life?
“Rationalization is a process of not perceiving reality, but of attempting to make reality fit one’s emotions.” – Ayn Rand, Author and Philosopher
Building beliefs
Beliefs are built unconsciously. However, you could build beliefs consciously.
- Use Your Attention: Shift your attention away from those that you don’t want to believe and put it on those that you want to believe
- Create Evidence: Gather evidence from stories, from self-experiments
- Seek Perspectives: Speak to those who have certain belief that you want to build and understand their perspective. See why they believe in, what they believe in.
Our beliefs shape who we are. You could rather build them consciously rather than leave them to chance.
“If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.” —Vincent Van Gogh, Dutch post-impressionist painter