Making a new friend Someone told me that it is very hard to make new friends once you reach a certain age. I believed it to be true until recently I began to question it. I tried to test my assumption while I was on my travel by connecting with someone I knew only as …
Making a new friend | Proximity | Light pollution Read More »
Psychological independence Relationships are healthy when there is psychological independence. It involves not needing others, giving them space to be and to grow as people. However, our human societies insist on us being psychologically dependent on others and equate it to feelings of love, respect, and loyalty. It is not only prevalent in families but …
Psychological independence | Three-Legged rabbit | Limited time Read More »
Go slow to go fast While helping my niece with her math problems, I noticed a pattern where she made more mistakes when she hurried to solve the problems. She argued that she wouldn’t be able to complete her exam and hence would lose marks. She failed to see that in her hurry to solve …
Go slow to go fast | Phantom limb | Learning fearlessness Read More »
Breaking rules When I started my career, I was on the conventional bench for a couple of months. One day, I raised my concern in an open forum to the senior management much to the chagrin of my ‘mentor’ who felt annoyed that he would be blamed for not ‘teaching me’ anything. Two good things …
Breaking rules | Managing upwards | Lessons from a swami’s journey Read More »
Creative constraints Constraints need not stifle our progress. Sometimes, they help us shape our uniqueness and ingenuity. Few people know how to leverage constraints to their favor. Dr. Govindappa Venkataswamy (Dr. V), founder of Aravind Eye Hospital is someone who demonstrated ingenuity, innovation, and vision by having self-imposed constraints. The Not-for-profit organization aimed to keep …
Creative constraints | Failing to lead | Real experience Read More »
Negative reinforcement Recently, while trying to understand incentives, I came across negative reinforcement. Negative reinforcement is not the same as punishment. The focus of negative reinforcement is the removal of something unpleasant in our experience that aims to reinforce the desired behavior. I realized negative reinforcement on many occasions unconsciously influenced my actions. For instance, …
Negative reinforcement | Negotiating salaries | False expertise Read More »
Moving away from rigidity As we age, we become stiff both physically and mentally. It is not only our muscles and bones that become rigid, but also our little egos and identities that lose their fluidity. We like to think this is who we are and this is how we will be till we reach …
Moving away from rigidity | Bonding with strangers | Context vs Environment Read More »
Power of pausing Last week, a small incident made me realize that I have been unconsciously responding in certain situations. I was using the same response repeatedly for certain incidents, without giving it much thought. It had eventually become my default response. However, when I paused this time, I was able to become aware of …
Power of pausing | Working with a bar raiser | Connecting with people Read More »
To grin and bear it The marathon event held during the 2020 Tokyo Olympics proved to be quite challenging for the runners. They had to endure unfavorable conditions, such as suboptimal temperature and humidity, as well as overcrowded drink stations. Despite these hurdles, Kenyan runner Eliud Kipchoge successfully won the Gold medal in the men’s …
To grin and bear it | The map is not the territory | I have nothing to add Read More »
Delegating decision making Shane Parrish, in his recent book, Clear Thinking, highlighted the dilemma of delegating decision-making for leaders. One of the challenges for leaders is to enable their teams to make critical decisions in their absence. Leaders don’t articulate to the team the most important criteria they use when they make the decision. While …
Delegating decision making | Making progress visible | Lesson from marathon Read More »
